Author Topic: rice crispies in my ears.  (Read 2449 times)

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Offline Årne Longbörgenssen

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rice crispies in my ears.
« on: July 17, 2005, 07:50:31 PM »
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  • i didnt really spend that much time in the water firday and saturday, and my ears don't hurt, but they're really funky. if i swallow hard or blow air into my eustacian tubes (like equalizing pressure in diving) theres this crackly rice crispies noise in my ears. ever get this ?
    The energy contained in one kilogram of thorium
    equals four thousand tons of coal

    Offline Årne Longbörgenssen

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #1 on: July 17, 2005, 11:18:36 PM »
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  • UPDDATE: now all i can hear is ricardo montalban saying "rich corinthian leather"
    The energy contained in one kilogram of thorium
    equals four thousand tons of coal

    Offline krut

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #2 on: July 18, 2005, 10:08:04 AM »
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  • this is interesting.

    any updates?

    any doctors in the house?

    Psycho

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #3 on: July 18, 2005, 10:21:41 AM »
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  • My God quick, Someone help him! He's cought the GAY!

    Offline Spindrift

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #4 on: July 18, 2005, 10:28:23 AM »
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  • A few weeks ago I was worried I did some serious damage to my ear. The lip of a wave broke directly into my ear. I was looking sideways, so my ear was directly exposed to the wave. The inside of my ear hurt and hurt badly. I was really worried the force of the wave somehow damaged my ear drum. Luckily, the pain went away. But it was WEIRD.

    Ever hear the George Carlin Rice Crispies joke. "I distinctly heard snap, crackle, Fuck you "

    Psycho

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #5 on: July 18, 2005, 11:07:03 AM »
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  • I had that happen too. I thought it busted my drum but luckily I was fine. Freaked me out tho.

    Offline uptown

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #6 on: July 19, 2005, 02:24:14 AM »
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  • hey! keep this crap in the mario room.  we are trying to have serious discussions about surfing up here.  mods!

    happy

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #7 on: July 19, 2005, 07:06:22 AM »
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  • My God quick, Someone help him! He's cought the GAY!
    hey, psycho proves my theory again! don't worry, jess will understand.

    Psycho

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #8 on: July 19, 2005, 07:26:30 AM »
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  • Do I have to Hump your boyfriend up the arse to prove to you im not gay. DO I!? :o

    Offline krut

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #9 on: July 19, 2005, 08:45:53 AM »
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  • Why Do All These Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock
    (copied form here: http://www.theonion.com/opinion/index.php?issue=4127&type=opinion&o=1&id=545 )

    Look, I'm not a hateful person or anything—I believe we should all live and let live. But lately, I've been having a real problem with these homosexuals. You see, just about wherever I go these days, one of them approaches me and starts sucking my cock.

    Take last Sunday, for instance, when I casually struck up a conversation with this guy in the health-club locker room. Nothing fruity, just a couple of fellas talking about their workout routines while enjoying a nice hot shower. The guy looked like a real man's man, too—big biceps, meaty thighs, thick neck. He didn't seem the least bit gay. At least not until he started sucking my cock, that is.

    Where does this queer get the nerve to suck my cock? Did I look gay to him? Was I wearing a pink feather boa without realizing it? I don't recall the phrase, "Suck my cock" entering the conversation, and I don't have a sign around my neck that reads, "Please, You Homosexuals, Suck My Cock."

    I've got nothing against homosexuals. Let them be free to do their gay thing in peace, I say. But when they start sucking my cock, I've got a real problem.

    Then there was the time I was hiking through the woods and came across a rugged-looking, blond-haired man in his early 30s. He seemed straight enough to me while we were bathing in that mountain stream, but, before you know it, he's sucking my cock!

    What is it with these homos? Can't they control their sexual urges? Aren't there enough gay cocks out there for them to suck on without them having to target normal people like me?

    Believe me, I have no interest in getting my cock sucked by some queer. But try telling that to the guy at the beach club. Or the one at the video store. Or the one who catered my wedding. Or any of the countless other homos who've come on to me recently. All of them sucked my cock, and there was nothing I could do to stop them.

    I tell you, when a homosexual is sucking your cock, a lot of strange thoughts go through your head: How the hell did this happen? Where did this fairy ever get the idea that I was gay? And where did he get those fantastic boots?

    It screws with your head at other times, too. Every time a man passes me on the street, I'm afraid he's going to grab me and drag me off to some bathroom to suck my cock. I've even started to visualize these repulsive cock-sucking episodes during the healthy, heterosexual marital relations I enjoy with my wife—even some that haven't actually happened, like the sweaty, post-game locker-room tryst with Vancouver Canucks forward Mark Messier that I can't seem to stop thinking about.

    Things could be worse, I suppose. It could be women trying to suck my cock, which would be adultery and would make me feel tremendously guilty. As it is, I'm just angry and sickened. But, believe me, that's enough. I don't know what makes these homosexuals mistake me for a guy who wants his cock sucked, and, frankly, I don't want to know. I just wish there were some way to get them to stop.

    I've tried all sorts of things, but it's all been to no avail. A few months back, I started wearing an intimidating-looking black leather thong with menacing metal studs in the hopes that it would frighten those faggots off, but it didn't work. In fact, it only seemed to encourage them. Then, I really started getting rough, slapping them around whenever they were sucking my cock, but that failed, too. Even pulling out of their mouths just before ejaculation and shooting sperm all over their face, chest, and hair seemed to have no effect. What do I have to do to get the message across to these swishes?

    I swear, if these homosexuals don't take a hint and quit sucking my cock all the time, I'm going to have to resort to drastic measures—like maybe pinning them down to the cement floor of the loading dock with my powerful forearms and working my cock all the way up their butt so they understand loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I mean, you can't get much more direct than that.

    Offline Crackie Onassis

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #10 on: July 19, 2005, 01:46:57 PM »
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  • Quote
    Do I have to Hump your boyfriend up the arse to prove to you im not gay. DO I!?


    Hey now, don't let the avatar give you any ideas!
    So heavy you can't even pick it up.

    Offline veggielasagna

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #11 on: July 19, 2005, 02:07:26 PM »
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  • Hey now, don't let the avatar give you any ideas!

    Are you really the Queen of 91st street?
    I knew I would never be hard core. So I tried to be soft core. Instead, I’m just an apple core.

    Offline Crackie Onassis

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #12 on: July 19, 2005, 02:22:05 PM »
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  • Yes, I am the Queen of 91st street, see:

    « Last Edit: July 19, 2005, 02:25:20 PM by RedDoor91st »
    So heavy you can't even pick it up.

    Offline veggielasagna

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #13 on: July 19, 2005, 02:25:49 PM »
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  • Yes, Kristi. I am the Queen of 91st street, and now you shall all taste the black sperm of my vengence!



    black sperm tastin'? is that anthing like taking the pepsi challenge?

    ps
    does this mean Tim is the princess?
    I knew I would never be hard core. So I tried to be soft core. Instead, I’m just an apple core.

    Offline Crackie Onassis

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    Re: rice crispies in my ears.
    « Reply #14 on: July 19, 2005, 04:24:43 PM »
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  • No, just a quote from Beyond the Valley of the Dolls from Ronnie Z-Man Barzell, aka: SuperWoman.

    So heavy you can't even pick it up.